The Good, The Bad, The Abs of 300 (blog)
Category: 300 Reviews | Posted by: stagewomanjen
Article Date: March 12, 2007 | Publication: comics2film.com | Author: Kev_incal
- Hot damn, that was a beautifully art-directed movie! The crispness, detail, hyper-realism and cartoonish blood.
- The expansion of the Queen's role. Great to contrast the battles, but also just to balance out the action as well.
- The music. I thought it was a bold and novel choice to mix traditional weepy Gladiator tunes with the modern rock drums etc.
- Action variety - I was apprehensive that I'd be watching a solid hour+ of repetitive killing at the Hot Gates (Bill's younger sister?), but they managed to throw all sorts of cool and crazy things that kept me amused.
- I think they accurately and clearly conveyed the motivations and reasoning behind King Leonidas and the Spartans. This could have easily become a 'WTF are these crazy Spartans doing?' flick but I really got a sense that their purpose and way of life was conveyed well.
- The hunchback wannabe Spartan guy (what's his name? Lumpy McMuffins?) looked rubberier than Batman's codpiece in Batman And Robin.
- Accents and ethnicities: Whycome in Hollywood British = Pan-European? Mmmkay Gerry Butler looked great and acted well, but his Scottish brogue kept falling in and out. The Queen was pretty bitchin', but where were her Grecian features/accent? The Spartan Oracle (Nippy McPotsmoker?) was a pale redhead. Uh yeah whatever. And do all Persians really have bad Sharpie eybrows and look like the bad maharaja from Moulin Rouge?
- Dude did EVERYBODY have to be so ripped?!? Where's Paunchy McDuffkin, the beer-gut Spartan? Before TV and fast food did everybody just look really built? Too many six-pacs, not enough kegs.
- The makeup - was it just me or did everybody had makeup that made the area between the eyes (around the nose) look raccoonish? I don't know if it was a result of all the digital manipulation to the film, but the makeup ended up often looking terrible.
Most profound takeaway from 300 - Forget sit ups, killing things and being a Spartan badass is the key to really great abs. Oh and 2nd most profound takeaway - It's high time capes made a comeback. D&G or Versace for Fall '07? Can I get mine in stripes?